Advances in computing and communications can present special challenges in speaking kindly to others and judging them favorably. Here's a case where a cell-phone provided a lesson in…

"Hi" Technology

Studying in Israel, I made a shocking discovery four days before I was to go back home for Pesach: My laptop computer, which I had brought for e-mail purposes (but I incidentally used to play card games during lunch), was gone! An intensive search throughout the dorm revealed nothing. No one knew what had happened to it. Besides me, there were only two people who had the password to it; otherwise it was useless. The two people were my roommates, Moshe and Chaim. I couldn't find either one of them. Both of them had cellular phones. I tried calling Moshe first, but there was no answer. I then called Chaim, who picked up. I said my name, and asked him, "Where's my computer?" in a tone perhaps a bit more accusative than I had intended. I then heard a dial tone - he had hung up! Calling back yielded no answer. This absolutely convinced me that Chaim had taken it, either as a prank or to use it for himself. I simmered with anger for a while, then decided to try to reach Moshe again as a last-ditch attempt at finding out exactly what had happened. Imagine my surprise when he told me he had used it the night before, stashed it under his bed, and completely forgot to tell me about it! Feeling very ashamed, I called back Chaim to apologize. I asked him if he had hung up because he was angry at me for accusing him. He explained that one of his friends had aggressively borrowed his phone in mid-call, cutting him off!

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